


It's Valentine's Day, Stupid

by JustAnotherBlonde



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Same Age, Chinese High School, First Kiss, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, SasoDei Week 2021, Swearing, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-02-25
Packaged: 2021-03-15 04:01:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29678121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustAnotherBlonde/pseuds/JustAnotherBlonde
Summary: SasoDei Week 2021 || February 24 || Rivals to LoversDeidara has been tormenting Sasori since middle school. Whythe hellis he offering Sasori chocolates on Valentine's Day??
Relationships: Deidara/Sasori (Naruto)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 9
Collections: SasoDei Week 2021





	It's Valentine's Day, Stupid

**Author's Note:**

> this may seem odd, but this is specifically set in a Chinese high school because a) i live here and b) i love the comic 19 Days (19天）and was inspired… like, to the extent that Sasori is super sweary just like Mo Guanshan 莫关山. idk why I like sweary high schoolers, but redhead Sas and redhead Mo just kinda vibe in my mind... sorry/not sorry for the random urban Chinese high school architectural details... PLEASE ENJOY THIS PIECE, I LOVE IT VERY MUCH.

“What is this?” Sasori could not believe his eyes.

Deidara, class clown, class _idiot_ , the _fool_ who liked to strut around Dawn High School calling himself Sasori’s _rival_ … stood before him, two hands extended, offering him _a box of chocolates_. He had caught Sasori in one of the stairwells at the back of the building, on the landing between the third and fourth floors. The gaping hole that served as a window looked out over the running track and apartment buildings beyond. It wasn’t that the window was broken: the glass-less window was somebody’s _brilliant_ cost-saving design.

“It’s Valentine’s Day, stupid, mn.” Deidara’s face was turned away, his eyes hidden behind his dumb blond fringe.

Sasori stared.

“I know it’s _Valentine’s Day_ , _stupid_ ,” he mocked. He felt hot for some reason. Did they finally install heating in this piece-of-shit school? No, they were in the stairwell. Basically outdoors. He and Deidara both wore layers and layers of warm thermals beneath their ugly track-suit uniforms. Deidara was even wearing fingerless gloves. “Yeah, it’s February fucking fourteenth. So what _the hell_ is this?”

Deidara’s blush was so deep, the color of his face matched Sasori’s hair. He still couldn’t meet Sasori’s eyes.

“Chocolates, mn.”

Sasori threw up his hands. “I can _see_ they’re chocolates, dumbass! What the hell are you doing?”

Extended arms collapsed; the box of chocolates dangled in Deidara’s limp hands. He stared at the floor. Sasori stepped closer, trying to meet the blond’s eye.

“I knew this was a stupid idea,” Deidara muttered. He wiped the back of his hand across his eyes. “I knew you’d—”

“ _You’re_ giving me these chocolates? Yourself? It’s not some dare? You’re _not_ pranking me?” Sasori spun away, hands pulling at his hair. “You _have_ to be pranking me. This is a joke!”

Deidara had terrorized Sasori ever since the first day they met. The scene was clear as a photograph in his mind: twelve years old, first day of middle school, and _BLAM!_ covered in the exploding cupcake Deidara had been so kind as to offer his ‘new friend.’

It was war from that day forward. Deidara loved pranks, but Sasori was a model student. He swiftly became an expert at spotting Deidara’s pranks before they happened and putting a stop to them. So Deidara decided he’d actually apply himself to his studies. He declared himself Sasori’s rival, and set to work _beating Sasori’s scores. On every test._ So Sasori worked harder in sports. But Deidara was just as athletic: they became rivals on the football team. Fine, Sasori thought, at least I still have my art. But no. Deidara had to be good at that too. It had gone on for _six years._ They’d be graduating high school soon, and when that happened, _finally_ , Sasori would be free of his tormentor.

His tormentor who ran so fast on the football pitch it was as if he was flying. His tormentor who chased the ball with such dogged persistence that no scraped knee, no twisted ankle would stop him. His tormentor with the determined blue eyes, always focused on his goal, whatever it may be. His tormentor with the dazzling white grin. His tormentor who created the strangest, most fascinating sculptures—then blew them up. His tormentor who, if he had to be perfectly honest, he was going to miss after graduation.

Sasori lifted a hand, his mind halfway made up.

Thank god the stairwell was empty. Thank _god_ it was after school, and the only people still on campus were in study hall. THANK GOD no one—

“Sasori? Deidara?” It was Konan. “What are you two—”

“Go away, Konan!” they both shouted. They looked at each other. The chocolates were hidden behind Deidara’s back. They shared a nervous smile, then immediately scowled at each other. Force of habit.

Konan looked from Sasori, to Deidara, then back to Sasori. Bemused, she shrugged and carried on her way.

“I’m not covering for either of you if you guys end up in the nurse’s office after your fight this time,” she called over her shoulder. “I wasn’t even here.”

The stairwell was empty again. Sasori looked at his ‘rival.’ Deidara’s blush had faded. He looked so piteously embarrassed, Sasori _almost_ felt bad for him. But then given how many times _Deidara_ had embarrassed _Sasori_ with his stupid pranks over the years, this was the purest retribution.

“Deidara, why _the fuck_ are you giving me chocolates?” Sasori asked in a low voice. “I could ask anyone in this school ‘What does Deidara think of me?’ and every _single_ person, teachers included, would say ‘Deidara hates the living fuck out of you. He probably prays you drop dead every night.’”

A wet laugh escaped Deidara’s mouth. “The teachers wouldn’t swear like that, mn.”

“Don’t change the subject!” Sasori shot back. Why was his body still this hot? Why was his heart beating a mile a minute? This wasn’t happening. This was a dream. He was about to wake up, home in his bed, and this will have _never_ happened.

“I don’t hate you,” Deidara muttered at the floor. He brought the chocolates out again. Unceremoniously, he flipped them into the air and let them sail out the window. “But I guess you still hate me, mn.”

He took a step towards the stairs. Sasori’s hand shot out and caught his sleeve. This action surprised them both. He quickly let go, but Deidara did not move.

Sasori’s heart was in his throat. He opened his mouth to speak, then closed it. He spun away, running his hands through his hair again.

“This isn’t happening,” he muttered to himself.

It was Deidara’s turn to gape. “Wait…”

Sasori spun around, and before he could even think, before he could let his brain shout ‘no, Sasori, what are you doing?!’ he leapt forward and kissed Deidara on the lips. He almost missed. He would have missed. But Deidara tipped his head down and caught him.

The kiss ended when Deidara’s grin grew too large for him to keep his lips closed. He put both hands on Sasori’s shoulders and pushed him away at arm’s length. His heart was ready to burst out of his chest. Sasori had just _kissed_ him! On the mouth! Unprompted! Oh—

Fuck.

Sasori, face contorted in confusion and disbelief, twisted out of his arms and bolted down the stairs.

“Sasori!”

He was fast. Of course he was fast. He was the fastest forward on the team. Deidara only scored more goals out of sheer perseverance. He had superior stamina. Sasori had superior footwork.

“Sasori, wait!”

“No!” Sasori shouted back. He was already at the school entrance, dashing down the stairs and along the side of the building.

Where was he going?

Sasori didn’t slow down until he spied it. The box of chocolates, dashed upon the ground. Without stopping, he stooped down and grabbed what he could. But he didn’t stop running.

“Oi! Where are you going, mn?” Deidara shouted at his back.

The only response he received was a rude hand gesture.

Deidara grinned. Fine: if Sasori wanted to be chased, Deidara would gladly pursue. His lips were tingling, hungry for more. He knew he’d catch Sasori, in the end. After all, he had the superior stamina.

Sasori cut across the field and headed for the main gate, exiting the school grounds.

They slipped into the flow of pedestrians. A city center school, the world on their doorstep.

Sasori headed up the main road, making a mad dash through the crowds. If it weren’t for his bright red hair, Deidara surely would have lost him.

He ran and ran, until his heart was bursting, not from the fact that he’d just kissed _Deidara_ —of _all people_ , Deidara! _—_ but because he was reaching his limit. He slowed his pace. Not because he wanted to, but because he had to. Where was he even running to? Where was he now?

The art museum? He had arrived at the art museum, the one where you needed to show your ID to get in. Shit. He stopped in his tracks.

Pounding footsteps behind. Of course.

“Sasori!” Deidara cried breathlessly. “Fuck! I think you set a record, mn!”

They stood in the plaza in front of the museum. Too public. Sasori’s hand shot out again, encircling Deidara’s wrist and dragging him forward.

“Ow…” Deidara pretended to whine.

Down the side of the building, around the back, behind an inexplicably large bush. Privacy. Finally.

Sasori shoved the chocolates back into Deidara’s hands.

Smirking, Deidara waved it as if he were weighing the contents.

“Are you giving me chocolates on Valentine’s Day, Akasuna, mn?” he laughed.

Sasori glared, but when he spoke he addressed the floor: “Oh, _now_ you’re suddenly all confident and calm and cool and sexy—”

“What was that last one?” Deidara leaned in, dipping his head so he could meet Sasori’s eyes. Sasori batted him away.

“Fuck off! I hate you!” Sasori covered his face with his hands, as if this would make his problem go away.

“No, you don’t,” Deidara crowed. It felt like he was floating. “Nobody kisses the people they hate like that, mn.”

Sasori slumped back against the museum’s rough sandstone wall, hands in his pockets. “Fuck…”

Deidara threw himself beside Sasori, leaving a hand’s-span between their bodies. He offered the chocolates again.

“These are for you, mn.”

“They’re a mess.”

Deidara tore at the remaining wrapping—there were precisely two pieces left inside, one crushed and oozing jam, the other miraculously unharmed.

“There’s not even any dirt!” he exclaimed triumphantly. He plucked up the untouched one and raised it to Sasori’s mouth. “Here.”

Sasori’s brow furrowed with all the concerns of the world that had ever existed since the dawn of time.

“I’m not eating chocolate from your hand.” But he didn’t move his own hand to take it.

“No? Then I’ll just—”

Rather than let Deidara consume the chocolate as he intended, Sasori slapped it from his fingers. It struck the ground with a sad little _thup_.

They looked at each other.

And burst out laughing.

Sasori doubled over; he was laughing so hard his stomach hurt. Deidara slid down the wall until he sat on the pavement, head between his bent knees.

“Hahaha!” Tears were streaming down Deidara’s cheeks. “You idiot!”

“Me? Ha! You’re the dumbass who started this dumb shit,” Sasori laughed. He braced himself on Deidara’s shoulder. He could scarcely stand.

Their laughter slowed; they caught their breath.

“Hah…” Sasori sighed. He offered Deidara a hand and pulled him to standing. With his hands on his hips he squared himself to Deidara, who leaned back against the museum wall. “So. Let’s recap. Today is Valentine’s Day.”

“Correct.” Deidara’s wide grin was infectious.

“You offered me chocolates,” Sasori continued, “which traditionally indicates that you like me.”

“Also correct.” Deidara’s air of confidence wavered just a hair. Was this really happening?

Sasori took a step closer and braced his hand on the wall by Deidara’s ear.

“Then I kissed you.”

Their faces were inches apart. Dancing blue eyes met daring brown ones.

“Which traditionally indicates that you like me, mn,” Deidara murmured, his gaze dropping to Sasori’s lips.

Sasori twitched backwards: “Maybe it was a mista—”

Deidara grabbed Sasori’s hips before he could escape.

“I don’t think so, mn.”

The blond fringe was in the way. Sasori brushed it aside.

“No, I’m quite sure that I hate you, Deidara,” he whispered. He stepped closer. His heart fluttered.

“Shut up.” Deidara punctuated the end of this sentence with a kiss.

Sasori flushed bright red, redder than his hair. He jerked away and averted his eyes. Deidara still clung to his hips. What if he took one step closer? His whole body flared with heat.

“I think I have a problem,” Sasori said in a small voice.

“What’s that?” Deidara stared at him, wide-eyed. Sasori quickly looked away.

“I think I actually _like_ y—kissing. You.”

Although he couldn’t meet Deidara’s eye, Sasori watched his wide, pale lips curl into a smile. Deidara pulled him close, hugged him so tight he could barely breathe. Sasori’s nose found its way into the crook of Deidara’s neck, which smelled like sweat and chalk-dust and the faintest hint of some kind of cologne or body wash. Blond hairs tickled his face. Why was hugging Deidara— _Deidara_ — _this_ nice? It didn’t seem right.

Deidara leaned back against the wall of the museum again, pulling Sasori along so that he rested gently against his body. Blue eyes sparked like a light bulb: Sasori recognized that look. He almost groaned out loud.

“Hey, who do you think is a better kisser, mn?” Deidara could barely contain his excitement.

“You seriously want to compete right now?” Sasori smirked. “You know it’s gonna be me.”

“Prove it, mnph! Mm…”


End file.
